OK, who needs a quick recap? Everyone? OK cool. Divorced (hell yea), in school, changed major from science to English, annnnnd moving in less than two weeks in with the man. We caught up? OK cool. So, I'm laying here in bed, Ladies G and L completely out. One of them did cough but no voices so I'm going to assume they finally fell asleep, and I'm reading random crap on facebook as always. I keep thinking, go shower, study for finals, do something other than lay here, but then another story pops up. My brain goes "Oh Piece of Candy!" and 45 minutes later here we are. So why am I writing this? Well two reasons, one since I plan on being an English major I think I should make an effort to focus on this blog that a very tiny amount of people read whenever I post it on facebook and two HOLYMOLYOFSAINTFRANCIS. This story I just read made me want to share this.
So this woman marries this guy who basically starts cheating on her 3 months into the marriage. OK fantastic he can rot. But she finds out by snooping on his phone. Now I'm not saying that I snoop on the mans phone. I dont...exactly. I look at his phone and his texts because he is HORRIBLE about telling me anything his mother has said. EVER. Also he has this really weird love of taking pictures of me (and himself when drunk) while I am sleeping. I didnt like it at first but now I love it even though he never does it anymore. Anyways back to point. So i quite innocently take his phone while we are out to dinner (lunch break sushi!!!) because I took a video of him a few weeks back and his mother wanted me to send it to her. He flips his shit. I mean yanks his phone back from me the moment I'm off guard, opens up his browser and starts closing web pages like they are bombs. Now me being me and having my past life of hell, i start thinking "what the hell kind of porn were you looking at??? "Was he not joking about toe sucking? I thought it was joke?" Quickly though my brain begins to work and I realize something else is up. So I ask. He wont tell me, actually gets kind of defensive about it. Now I feel like crap for trying to take his phone to send something to his mother. He's been on it more recently playing this game downloaded. We sit, I feel bad, he now feels bad and so he says "I was looking at the sale JC Penny had going on." O...k...? What am I supposed to do with that? I bring up the fact that I have never opened his browser and looked at it. He gives me a pointed look. Anyone remember the scene in Inside Out where the mom looks at the dad and he looks like a deer and headlights going "what women what??" Yea. That was me. And then like the light bulb they used to convince Riley to run away (Sir E is obsessed with this movie right now) it hits me. His mom asked him if he was getting me a ring for Christmas because JC Penny was having a sale. He told her (and me) he was not getting me a ring for Christmas. He did say he was looking. And has sense put a pass code on his phone until after Christmas because I wont stop trying to steal it. He loves me. I hate surprises. I just wanna know. I wonder if his mom would give me his bank statements...OK I know that's bad and this woman who snooped on her husbands phone was able to justify her actions because he was cheating man whore and I cant because my boyfriend may or may not be buying me a ring and hating surprises is not justifiable under those circumstances. But can you blame me? I mean really, knowing when he could very well be asking me to marry him could be right behind that pass code locked phone that I figured out the pass code to. Assuming he didnt change it because I did tell him I knew. See I'm honest. But still! I just wanna know. Ugh I guess this has been enough rambling and I should go see if Sir E has finally given it up to the sleep gods.
