"We've got a sick kid in here!"

The above title are the exact words Lady G yelled yesterday as a Lady L began vomiting up oatmeal from the morning.  It was 245 in the afternoon, we had just walked in the door and I was taking a bite out of a cookie.  I managed to grab a trash can and catch the rest.  She had been off all day and complained of her tummy hurting on and off.  I myself was tired and having some tummy troubles as well.  Lady L fell asleep by 11 and slept til 1.  She came and laid on the couch with me until it was time to get Lady G from school.  She never complained of her stomach hurting after her nap, but in the car she was pale and tired looking.  I had managed to give her a strong dose of elderberry in the morning and I think thats what helped her make it so long before it all came up.  After she threw up it was like a whole new kid.  I made her lay in bed for a while and watch (can ya guess?) Frozen.  She was fine for the rest of the night, though I could feel a small fever hanging on to her.  She still had it this morning.  I gave her and Lady G another huge dose of elderberry.  I tell ya this stuff is amazing.  I make B take it daily and since getting him to take it I have noticed a huge difference.  I sadly was a little bad and not giving the Ladies a good dose daily of the elderberry which is how Lady L caught a mild version of this stomach bug going around.  She isnt around children except on Sundays at church.  I'm sure she got it from her little buddy.  I feel bad for that little girl, knowing that she must be having a much harder time than Lady L.  Both Ladies had another big dose of elderberry this morning and we are officially out (of the liquid form that is).  I'll have to get more tomorrow.  I also gave Lady G some cough medicine this morning.  I meant to yesterday and forgot so of course her cough was worse.  The great thing about this Chestol though is it knocks a cough out like no other.  B and I were having horrible congestion coughs and dry coughs, took one dose and man what a difference and you are suppose to take it every 2 hours.  Its amazing stuff.  If I seemed scattered brained its because Im watching Hoarding. 

Maybe I can get this part written without too much all over the place.  The purpose of this blog post is just to once again go over some alternative medicines for you guys.  Elderberry, I think I preach this one more than any other.  How many Walking Dead fans do we have out there reading this?  Remember the season when they were being plagued with the flu?  What did Hershel go out and gather?  Elderberry.  It is a natural flu fighter.  Its an immune system booster.  It is amazing.  The moment flu season comes around (so typically about a week before Lady G starts school) we start daily doses of elderberry.  No flu in this house.  Usually no stomach bugs either but Ive been a little slow this year.  Bad mom moment, I do have them.  When the Ladies do get stomach bugs, the effects are so much more milder.  Lady G was vomiting two weeks ago and though I cant be certain if it was the stomach bug or if it was just from the pizza we ate (I was feeling sick as well) once she got it all up she was fine.  A slight fever the next day, and of course the need to sleep, but she was fine.  Lady L threw up twice yesterday, once early in the morning with B (which he told me after he got home from work vs at 5 am when she got sick...) and then in the afternoon.  She is fine and enjoying her morning Daniel Tiger right now.  This stuff is amazing even if you dont start giving it to them until they get sick.

My next two things are olive leaf and echinacea.  Now typically I always recommend taking these two together since they work wonderfully together, however I am currently having B take two echinacea daily in hopes of it helping him out with his morning mucus.  While elderberry is amazing, I cant say that it gets us over the common cold.  When someone gets a sniffle, its time for olive leaf and echinacea.  Olive leaf is another great immune system booster, it promotes healthy blood pressure, supports the cardiovascular system, and helps boost up the energy you lose while sick.  We seem to get over the common cold a lot faster with this stuff especially when we add in the echinacea.  Ehinacea dries up the mucus.  Sir E was struggling pretty bad with a cold and I was giving him the highest dose I could three times daily.  After about three days of this he finally started drying up.  I was getting worried due to it sounding like it moved to his chest.  Thankfully it was just all the mucus breaking up.  I even used it with a Pom we use to have who had horrible allergies and would get snot balls that she coughed up.  Helped wonders.  I will say if nursing it is not advised.  I would assume from the worry of it drying up your milk (I didnt inquire as to why, but I asked our Alternative Medicines Doctor), but if you are wanting to take it in hopes of passing it to your little one they do make it in a drop form that works for under 12 months.  I actually think that the one I have goes all the way down to newborn.  Any time Sir E wakes with a yellow runny nose, I give it to him and its gone by the afternoon.  The Ladies also have some mixed with elderberry that I give them for colds.  If pregnant I would ask the owner of the store you are buying it from.  Most Modern Medicine doctors have no clue and will advise against it.  If taking it drink lots of fluids as you should if sick anyways, but this stuff dries you up so drink drink drink.

You also need a good respiratory health support.  The one we have supports bronchial, lung, and sinus.  People get busy, you put off taking care of the signs of colds and before you know it you wake up hacking up a lung.  Now what?  You pull out the big guns.  Keep doing your elderberry of course *wink* but drop the olive leaf/echinacea and start on your respiratory support.  I love ours.  I am fairly certain I had managed to pick up bronchitis last year.  I was ready to go to the doctor it was getting so bad, but as a last ditch effort I headed to the Natural Food Store and the wonderful lady there gave me the miracle I needed.  Now due to my thyroid medications I have to wait at least 4 hours before taking "natural supplements".  It was recommended to take this 4 times daily so I had to squeeze in the fourth one a few hours after the third.  After about three days I could breath again, my chest didnt hurt, and I had energy.  A few weeks ago when the weather was playing hot and cold B and I got sick.  I had him taking this stuff and he cleared up pretty quickly from it too.  Some times you just need something a little stronger so its always a good idea to have in a good heavy duty respiratory support.  Its ok if its a little more expensive because most likely you wont be taking it all the time.  Its your back up remember, for when life gets in the way.

After all that I'm sure you are wondering what could you possibly still need?  Cough!  We all get little coughs, dry coughs, congested coughs, allergy coughs, cough cough cough.  Yuck.  So you need a good cough remedy.  I recommend something like Chestol.  It is honey based and works wonders.  Breaks up all the gunk and helps you get it up and out.  It knocks out the cough for Lady G every time, and even after we had her tonsils removed and got her over the infection causing their engorgement, shes still prone to coughs.  When she was 2 months she got her first ear infection, at 4 months bronchitis, 6 months a virus in her lungs, 9 months an ear infection, and 10 months bronchitis again.  We lived in New York and I think it was just a lot for her to handle.  It was also before I had this great of an understanding of Alternative Medicine.  I am fairly certain all of that is what caused her weaker immune system.  So having all the knowledge I do now, I keep a good cough medicine in the house.  Chestol is the first one I found that works this wonderfully.  Its amazing. 

Now I do feel I should touch upon skin health.  My sister sent me some pictures of my nephew this morning and though it was difficult to tell I am fairly certain he is having a bad eczema flare up.  I noticed on Lady G's hands last night that they were cracking, breaking out, and becoming inflamed as well.  She gets horrible eczema during the winter months and my sweet nephew tends to have flare ups too.  The root of eczema comes from the diet.  In order to "cure" it you need to change your diet.  What are my diet recommendations?  Whole30 of course.  Clean out your system, let it reboot and figure out from there whats causing it.  I would be willing to bet for most of you its dairy.  Since clearing dairy out of my system I dont have eczema flare ups anymore.  I do still get dry skin from my thyroid, but not eczema.  If I could take dairy our of Lady G's diet I think she would be so much better off, but alas I cant because of school.  We shall see whats going to happen with Lady L next year...  Anyways for those who arent going to change their diets here's what you need to have on hand for flare ups.  Vitamin E oil or lotion.  This will proved relief from itching and pain from cracking.  Once its no longer inflamed, shea butter is a good thick lotion to help the healing process continue.  We actually have a wonderful shea butter lotion that I just found at Kroger.  Its 10$ a bottle and in the baby section.  Its vegan and organic.  No added chemicals or anything you wouldnt want touching your sweet baby's bottom.  I love using it on Sir E and will be putting some on Lady G's hands and arms today.  We also had a great lavender soap last year that I found at Whole Foods.  My husband hated it because it tangles Lady G's hair horribly, but I loved it because it soothed their dry skin better than their lotion.  We ran out in the spring and I havent been able to make it back to Whole Foods since.

So now you know about skin health and some amazing Alternative medicines.    I simply have one more thing before I let you go.  Fluids.  Water is the number one of course, but lets not kid ourselves, water doesnt do much for a sore throat.  Herbal Teas are the next best thing.  Yogi has become my favorite brands of tea lately.  They have a wide variety of teas for symptoms so its easy to treat the symptoms.  Unless you are nursing or pregnant go for whatever kind you want, just keep it herbal.  Pick up some Raw or organic honey and add that to your tea if you need the sweet (its good for sore throats too) if you dont need the added sweet flavor, put in some coconut milk for fat.  From their juice.  I recommend this more for the kiddos, but adults can enjoy it too espically if you have had vomiting, some times a little juice is better than water or tea.  Of course there is a catch, when I say juice I mean the real deal.  If it doesnt have stuff floating in the bottom, put it back.  If you can find it, kombucha is a great thing.  Dont shake it.  Learned that one the hard way...

Well I hope you were able to make it through my ramblings and found some useful information.  Sir E has discovered the talking story books and is saying Ga Ga Ga over and over at hearing his grandparents voices.  Lady L has pulled out the Mickey book...I hate that book.

Body Image

Before I start what I hope to be an eye opening blog post, let me say that I had a wonderful and fulfilled morning at Church.  My faith in the Lord has never been as strong as what it is today.  I never lost faith, but I have been lost many times in the understanding of the way things are.  I no longer feel lost, but completely at home with this Church.  Those who know me, know that I suffer from anxiety over meeting new people.  To go to Church on my own without the security of  my husband was incredibly difficult.  Making myself do it has been one of the most rewarding things I have accomplished. 

The other day I read a blog post about the song "All About That Bass" and how it was sending the wrong message to our girls.  Essentially it was stating that the song sent the message that girls need the approval of men when it comes to their bodies.  I had never really looked at it that way and once I did I began to see another message that it and others like it were sending.  

I constantly see pictures of heavier women stating "I'm not fat, I'm fluffy" or "More to love" or even the simple "I embrace my curves".  You should love your body, no matter how you look.  My body is covered in scars both outwardly and inwardly.  I have scars from men who I thought cared for me, I have scars from years of falling on my face/knees/legs/back, you name it, it hit the floor or a surrounding object.  My stomach is covered in the scars of baring three children in three years.  I am wounded from some, healed from overs, but will forever be scared.  It is my life story written where some can see and others to look deeper.  I embrace that about myself.  What I do not embrace is this thought of fat being sexy.

There was a time when I was sexy.  I knew I was.  I had nice large breast, my stomach was flat, my hips were big, but not covered with a few layers of fat, my body was amazing.  I almost wish I had braved a bikini.  When B and I got married I weighed between 150-155.  I wore sexy outfits from Victoria Secrets, as well as bras and lacy underwear.  I loved for my husband to see me naked.  In fact there was a short time (before the boys at Fort Drum took over our house) that we barely wore clothes at all, in the middle of Northern New York winter.  I loved my body, my husband loved my body and that fueled me to show it off to the man I loved at all times.  Aside from my husband, sister, and mother, no one has seen me completely naked (well and my children).   Not even the doctors at the hospital when I delivered my children saw me completely naked.  I have kept my modest ways even when I wouldnt have minded the world catching a glimpse of me which is why I have no bikini pictures.  My body was sexy, smooth, and though covered in a few scars outwardly, it was something to look at.  It belonged on the cover of every magazine.  It belonged on billboards that said "Embrace your curves."  My body sent the right message.  I was the correct healthy weight for my BMI, and yet many labeled me as "large".

A few weeks ago when I weighed myself I was 186.  I have not weighed myself since, but will when I head to my mothers this week (we have no scale here).  I am fat.  I am overweight.  My stomach is slowly shrinking, but it will never be flat, no matter how hard I work at it.  My dear friend, who has lost all her baby weight and then some, described her belly as a deflated ball sack.  Mine is heading that way (Im slowly making it to the "darkside" girl!).  That will never change, no matter how much effect she and I put into making out tummies flat, it will never change.  Its skin, skin that was pulled out and stretched to accommodate our growing babies that we had so close in age.  Over time some will go back in place, but not all.  Thats fine with me.  Even with a saggy belly, my dear friend is Sexy again.  My hips are also slowly losing size.  Its most notable in my pants that love to slide down since there isnt as much left to hold them up.  I have big hips, always have.  Some like to call them birthing hips.  I like to call them daaaaaaamn hips.  They arent that way now, but slowly going back.  It takes time to get your body back to the way it was when you accepted less than perfect for so long.

Now by now some of you are probably slamming me, thinking that I am trying to fat people suck at life (I'm not), so let me tie this all together.  No one should aspire to be skinny.  People like me will never be labeled as skinny either and here is why, my bones are big.  They really are, my body build is larger than some of my tiny friends.  Ive always been labeled as large.  That label is bullshit.  I was not large.  I am now because I am covered in unneeded fat.  Lets face if the Zombie Apocalypse where to happen tomorrow, cardio is not my number 1 and my body is close to a Walkers Buffet, but give me some more time and I'll be able to prove that "large" isnt fat.  What all these magazines pushing skinny or fat arent telling you is that you should aspire to be healthy.  You should want to be at a healthy weight, you should want to eat healthy (which if youve followed me at all you know I dont mean bland, in fact if your food is bland you are doing it wrong).  Im not saying you should want to be decked out in muscles hitting the gym every day and could lift a small car unless thats how you want to look, either.  Im saying stop accepting the unhealthy version of you, get off your butt, drop the excuses, and drop all that unhealthy weight.  

The middle and last picture were taken today.  In the middle photo I am wearing leggings.  I havent worn those since before I had Lady L.  I couldnt fit into them.  The shirt I have on I havent worn since I had Sir E.  I hated how fat I looked in it.  Today I wore them together, feeling amazing because I could fit into those clothes without a bulge.  My hips were smoothed out, my tummy was smoothed out, and a few times I had to the pull the leggings up because they were slipping down.  My wedding ring is lose.  It hasnt been this lose since before Lady L.  My face looks thin.  Even my hands as I am typing look thinner to me.  I dont get winded going up stairs (with the exception of the church stairs but I am in a hurry as I run across the street and up three flights of stairs to get to sunday school.  The elevator terrifies me...).  I dont get winded chancing the girls around the back yard.  I love the body that I am creating.

What all these songs about having a big butt/hips, and all these signs about loving your curves are telling you is to settle.  Dont settle.  Take a minute to look at your body, just you.  Tell me, does it look healthy?  Go for run and tell me how long it takes you to get winded and have to stop.  Tell me how far you get before you just give up.  Tell me if you feel comfortable holding your panties up and letting everyone see how big they are, or even your jeans.  I dont feel comfortable doing that.  I look at how large they are and think "am I really that big?  have I really let myself become this?"  I watch my blood pressure at the doctors office and realize its higher than what it use to be.  I watched my thyroid prescription go higher and higher for 6 months before it finally stopped.  I've watched my face get swollen and greasy, and Ive watched my children get completely out of control from sugar.  Sugar.  Let that word sink in.  Sugar.  

Don't buy into the skinny side of this world either.  Being Photoshop isn't real.  Starving yourself to fit into size 2 jeans isn't real.  I will never be a size two.  Why?  Because my body isn't built for that.  I'll settle for a size 8 and even with that goal, my hips are probably still too big.  Every body is built differently and that is both amazing and horrible.  Some people really are born with the issue of weight but they can change that by changing how they view and eat their food.  Some people are born tiny and struggle with putting weight on which again will change when their food does.  I preach this to all of you on my facebook and out in the world.  Your food and your will is what will change you.  Aspire to have the perfect body!  Don't aspire to fall into the lie that people love to sell you. 

I am not happy with this body.  I want my sexy curves back.  I want to fit into a medium sized shirt and think wow.  I have a Hooters shirt that is a size small (my breast barely squeezed into that) and I have had it since B came home from basic.  I looked amazing in it.  I have kept it all these years because one day I am going to put it back on.  My goal weight is 140-145.  We will see if I look too skinny and if so you better believe I will trade my Kale chips for saturated fat, put my almond butter up and dive into a jar of nutella.  I will skip out on my healthy treats and let the refined sugar rain down upon my body, wrecking havoc, causing headaches, stomach aches, and bloating.  B will buy pregnancies test for me to take for my belly will look as though I have to be pregnant.  He will worry his vasectomy has reversed (which can happen fyi) and I will laugh telling him I had to gain some pounds.  I will stop the work outs, stop the yoga, and I will indulge.  Then after I have gained 5 or so pounds I will put it all down and go back to my healthy lifestyle.  I will embrace my curves, the real curves, not the fat that everyone keeps trying to convince you is healthy, but the curves under it.  I will do this.  I have faith in myself and I have faith that at some point all of you will wake up and listen to me.  It goes deeper than just the fat on your body, but today, today is about your body.

Nght Terrors are the Devil

As a mother of three night terrors are nothing new to me.  If you are a parent there is a pretty good chance you have experienced a night terror, and by you I mean you have witnessed your child having one.  If you haven't let me give you a little insight on what a night terror is vs a nightmare.  A nightmare is a dream.  While having this dream you may cry out and if someone could easily wake you.  You can also wake up on your own with the gripping terror still holding onto you.  A night terror is when you cant wake up.  If someone touches you it only tightens the dream state, causing you to panic even more.  Here is how a night terror can look: a seemingly asleep child scream as though they are in horrific pain, convulsions, shaking, non responsive, pupils not dilating, ect.  For a first time parent it is the most terrifying thing.  Lady G started having them around 10 months.  Her first one was while we were at my parents and it was awful.  After several more I figured out how to get her out if.  I simply gave her a paci and shhhhed her.  I did not touch her.  Touching for most children worsens it.  She out grew them around one and half two.  Lady L was next, around the same age.  Hers was heart breaking for me.  She would be screaming momma over and over again as if someone had ripped her from my arms.  I gave her a paci, shhhed her, and was able to rub her on the back.  I could not talk to either of the.  They would both either be standing in their cribs or sitting, never laying down.  Lady L grew out of it too, around 18 months.  Now we get to Sir E.  Last night he had a night terror.  I have never seen anything like it.  He was convulsing like he was having a seizure.  When I first saw him its what I thought, but his screaming told me it wasn't.  He was screaming as if he was in pain.  The way his arm was turned I thought he had to be in pain, but I didn't touch him.  I shhhed him, saying his name softly.  I still didn't touch him.  B came in took one look at him and picked him before I thought to tell him not too.  The screaming increased to a volume I didn't think he could reach.  B freaked out and handed him to me.  He got his paci and slowly Sir E calmed down.  I then had the hard part of waking him up.  Sir E is a heavy sleeper once he hits his deep sleep.  Nothing wakes him.  It took some doing but slowly we got him to come too.  He continued to convulse on and off.  He would randomly zone out and his body would go almost limb.  It was terrifying.  I was ready to take him to the ER thinking something more had to be wrong.  About the time I got the bag ready he suddenly came to fully.  His eyes lost the glaze and he was himself, an angry version of himself since he was confused as to why he was awake, but he was still himself.  We put him back to bed and B said it had to of been that bad because he picked him up.  He was probably right, but I didn't blame him for picking him up.  It was taking a lot for me not to pick him up too.

On the Whole30 front I have made it to day 9.  I feel pretty happy with myself for having made it 9 days.  I'm not really craving anything aside from chocolate, but I dont think that is something I will ever stop craving.  I also want some awesome beef jerky but alas my health food store didn't have any that was sugar free, it was all 2% or less.  I would love to make a Whole Foods run soon, but money is still tight.  We are working hard on changing that, but its never easy.  I have lately been thinking about getting a job at a gas station.  I could work nights, granted that's not the safest time to be working, but I told B I would carry my OC spray.  Point a gun in my face and I will fully unload that crap on you.  It would be nice to have some extra money though for bills or just to put back.  I know once we make it to next year when we get our taxes back life will go back to easy living.  I can pay off all our credit card debt and we can keep all the extra money from B's BAH and put it back.  When I think about it like that it makes me go whats the point of getting a job now?  Still though having two incomes would be nice.  I dont know though, more thought is required I suppose.  All  I have been for the past 4 years is a mom, I dont really know if I want to miss out on being a mom while they are still young and need me so much.  It would be a lot of work for B too which I know he never realizes when I say I'm thinking about getting a job.  All he sees is more money for us, not the part of him having to do dinner, bath, and bed time for all three kiddos.  I know he doesn't realize that his alone time would be gone and that his time for homework would be cut shorter.

Well I suppose I'm off.  I have dinner that needs to be started while the kiddos are playing I hope nicely in the Ladies room.

Life Goes On

I am on day for of my Whole30.  I had to restart...twice.  The first time was the day after my grandmothers funeral.  My mother had been cooking for so many people and though my sister and I tried to help when we could, she was just over cooking.  So we had pizza and salad.  Mine was at least gluten free.  I took a break the following day as we tried to get things back in order at home, and then proceeded to eat half a snickers bar the following night...and a small bag of chips.  Ive done pretty well though.  My sugar cravings are a little less each day.  The main point of the day that truly hits me is at night.  I want sugar so bad.  Last night I actually didn't have a snack other than a banana.  I was too tired to put an effort into making something, but needed a little something.  Ive been making this "ice cream" as a little dessert for myself.  Its been warmer than usually the past few days and Ive wanted something cool to eat.  All it contains is a frozen banana (I added some strawberries too), coconut milk, and vanilla.  Sooooo good.  The coconut milk gives me a little more fat too which is awesome.  Usually when the food cravings hit I go for a bowl of fruit with Almond Butter.  Helps to fill me up and helps with the sweet cravings.  I actually don't eat a lot of fruit during the day, just mainly once a day since I realized last time I was eating fruit all the time in place of the sugar.  Now I just eat it if I'm starving at night and to kill that crazy beast telling me I need chocolate. 

Since I'm only 4 days in I'm not noticing a lot of chances.  I have noticed that I just want to sleep the mornings away and that I have to push myself to get things done around the house, but once I get going I start to feel better.  I have noticed that the I'm not always starving like I was when I did the first one so many months ago, which is nice.  I have also noticed my body seems to be craving fish.  We cant afford much right now but I did buy some frozen wild caught salmon the other week and it was amazing.  I tried to make some salmon cakes today but canned salmon belch.

Ive been trying to make an effort in my appearance lately.  After B and I got married I stopped wearing contacts since that was something our insurance didn't cover.  I still wore make up most of the time, but not a lot and B always liked me without the crazy dark eyeliner I use to wear.  It completely brought out my eyes though.  After Lady G was born I didn't even bother, I didn't have time, but once she got older I started to wear it again, then Lady L came along.  Needless to say for the past 4 ish years I've only put makeup on when we were going some where nice and it was just the two of us.  The past few days though Ive been wearing it again.  Nothing like how I use to but, a little, as well as a necklace or earrings.  It makes me feel better about myself.  I would curl my hair too, but its in that in between stage of growing.  I was fixing Lady G's hair today and realized I should teach her that appearance is important, though not everything.  We talked about how you dress can say a lot about you and I want to make sure that I put an effort into my appearance from now on.  Often times people look at me, hair up, yoga pants, and a tank and think, "bless her heart she must not get any time to herself with all those kids".  While this is partially true, it doesn't mean that I should be pitied.  What they dont know is that I have a thyroid condition that makes me tired, and some times depressed.  What they dont know is that I dont feel comfortable in my jeans because of the little bulge I have from three children.  What they dont know is that I had time to get dressed, I have time to shower, I had time to maybe even put on make up, but I chose not too.  The reason could be as simple as we just needed bananas or more complex like my son keeps having random spells of vomiting and we've been cooped up for days but I really needed to take the Ladies to the park before they went crazy from staying in doors forever.  I dont want to be looked at as a disheveled mother anymore.  My children are dressed neatly and cleanly, why shouldn't I be?  I put an effort into their appearance and I should do the same with mine.  Plus like I said it makes me feel good about myself.

On the meal out look we are having chili tonight.  Im a little worried about how spicy it might end up being, but here's to hoping.  I am going to warm some beans up for Lady G, Lady L, and maybe even let Sir E have some too.  The Ladies seem to think its not chili without the beans, what ever, extra protein and they aren't doing a Whole30 with me.  Lady L is doing a 90-95/10-5 with me meaning 90-95% of the time she is eating Whole30.  Lady G's is much less thanks to school.  B I couldn't even tell you.  He said if I do this by myself for the full 30 days he'd do one next.  Yea...sure.  He did admit to having to self control and that is why he isn't doing it with me.  I personally just want him to stop complaining about it.  He keeps telling me he wishes we could eat like we use to.  It drives me made.  We use to eat fairly well, but we had a ton of gluten in our lives.  After I had Lady L I would get these crippling headaches that would only go away if I slept.  I took gluten out and they disappeared.  I cant go back to eating gluten all the time and honestly I dont want to.  Its fine with me to have it once in a blue moon, but not daily.  I'm pretty sure thats what he misses is the gluten.  We had it in everything.  Ive been making Lady L these breakfast bowls of sausage, egg, veggies and since I found some awesome salsa, salsa.  B made himself one, but used some flour tortillas I had bough a few weeks ago for him (I'm so use to not using them I just use lettuce when we have "tacos" as do the girls).  He for some reason thought that he needed them and I kept trying to tell him he could just make a bowl and it would taste just as good.  He's stubborn, but mark my words, when he does his Whole30 he will not cheat.  I even told him if he did it I would let him go back to eating whatever he wanted, I wouldnt make it or buy it,  but he could.  My hope is that once he finishes the Whole30 he'll see how much better he feels and if he does eat junk his body will reject it.

On a fun note, I made Paleo mayo that was amazing.  Ive made it before, but this recipe was a little different and I loved it.  From there I turned it into Paleo ranch for some buffalo chicken meat balls I made and it was great.  I feel really good about my cooking skills when I make things like that. 

Well I'm done with my long ranting of an up date, but I have a feeling that if you read this blog you like my ranting dont you?  Come on admit it.  There ya go.

Rough Week

So clearly I have been gone and it has been a rough week.  My mother sent me a text message Monday night letting myself and siblings know that our Grandmother (my dads mom) was not expected to make it through the night.  She had a stroke a few weeks ago and hasnt remembered who any of us were since Lady G was 3 and Lady L was still a baby.  Lady G remembers her and had been asking me constantly to go see her.  After the stroke I had to tell her we couldnt and that Mamaw (what we call her) would be dieing soon.  For some that may seem odd that we are that open with our daughter about death and life, but we are.  About 30 minutes after my mother sent me the message she sent another informing us that Mamaw had passed away.  I packed up the Ladies and Sir right after Lady G got of school and we headed to my parents.  My sister and her family were already there.  My brother made it a few hours later.  I could tell having us all there meant the world to my dad.  He for some reason always had it set in his mind that he would be burying her alone.  I had always planned to be there and I think my siblings had too.  We talked about her for a short time, each of us remember something about her we loved.  It brought a smile to my dads face.  The funeral was rough.  It was just us, all of her family having already passed.  She was 88 years old, out living all of her siblings (2 brothers and 5 sisters).  Before the funeral we were finally able to get through to Lady G that Mamaw had died.  I think that was when it sunk in for me too.  She and I both cried.  I noticed everyone avoiding us.  My dad couldnt deal with it, his anxiety rose as time got closer, everyone else couldnt face the raw emotion that child was experiencing.  She asked many questions and I answered them threw teary eyes. She told me she was sad because Mamaw had died.  I told her I was too. 

During the funeral Sir E suddenly became obsessed with his Granddad (my dad).  He wanted to touch him constantly.  I could tell it was helping my dad get through it.  I think it reminded him of the story of how he met his Granddad.  Great Granddad's mother had just passed away and my dad was only a a few days old.  They were at the grave site when my Great Granddad first saw my dad.  He took my dad from my Mamaw and carried him off into the woods.  My dad says that his Granddad transferred all his love into him that day. 

It was a closed casket and for that I am greatful.  My brother brought a photo of her, 8 years before I was born.  I want to remember her they way I saw her in the picture.  She was gorgeous and strong looking.  I dont want to remember her weak and fragile. 

Lady G hasnt asked about her since the funeral.  We walked over to my Grandmothers grave (my moms mom).  It was just nice to stop for a few minutes.  I use to go to her Grave all the time when I was a teenager.  I'd sit and talk to her.  I wasnt close to her when she passed, though I was getting there.  For some reason going to her grave just seemed like most comforting place to me.  Lady G asked where Mamaws head stone was and I told her she didnt have one yet.  I promised we'd go back when she did have one so she could see.  I think we should bring flowers for her. 

Its hard to even write about this.  I dont think that I have really taken the time to stop and accept this.  There is so much going on in this world that is dark and loosing her just reminds me of all the things I could have done and should have done.  I wasnt around much after Lady G was born (or even a few years before).  With B being in the Army, we just were close to home, but I could have called her.  I could have taken more time to see her when we were there.  My last memory of her as her was when I was pregnant with Lady G.  I had just found out what I was having and I went straight to her house before I told anyone else.  I showed her the picture and told her it was a girl.  I sat and talked with her for a while.  Even then her mind was going.  I still cherish that moment though.  Maybe thats why Lady G was so bonded to her.  I dont know.  Either way she will be greatly missed by Lady G and I.  As much as I tried to prepare myself for her passing, it doesnt take the pain away.

Sick Day

So I am sorry for never posting yesterday, it was a sick day in the house.  The Ladies were up and running and feeling fine, but B and I were not feeling too hot.  He stayed home from work he felt so bad.  It was all congestion too and staying an hour later the night before didnt help his sore body.  Thanks to my mad alternative medicine skills I had him feeling back to normal by noon.  Sir E woke with a smokers cough (meaning he was trying to cough up a lung, not that my 9 month old son has taken up smoking or is even around anymore who smokes).  He actually was in a pretty good mood considering he couldnt breath through his nose and was swallowing snot.  But you can clearly see my reasoning behind the lack of posting, I even took a nap yesterday, I never nap.

So my breakfast was same as yesterdays,  but with pork tenderloin instead of eggs.  Lunch was a salad with a boiled egg, two slices of back, and some oranges.  I topped it with a roasted bell pepper dressing.  Very tasty.  Dinner was hamburgers and hot dogs with brocolli and "homefries".  Of course no bread or cheese, but thats how we have gotten use to eating our hamburgers/hot dogs.  I roasted some red bell peppers to add to it.  So good.  Usually we have avocado too, but I forgot to grab some at the store.  Anyways, it was very tasty, it was also simple and something the Ladies love to eat.

Sir E has his check up for weight on Friday.  I am hoping he has packed on at least a pound.  I feel like he looks bigger and a little heavier, but who knows.  I have a food journal to take with me so his doctor can see what hes eating and when.  Hopefully that will be helpful if he hasn't gained any weight.

Well I am going to have to cut this short, Sir E is not so politely calling my name and Ive got a Great Pyrenees ready to eat his food container if I don't feed him soon.

Day One

First off let me apologize for the no pictures today.  Today was...tiring I guess?  I actually woke up before the Ladies, Sir E and I hung out in bed for a little while and I remembered to take my thyroid pill today, but it was an off day (two days of missing meds and fighting off a cold will do that to ya).

Anywho let me just jump right in.  The Ladies and I had aspeargus, an egg each, two sausages, and Kale (for me).  It was most enjoyable, however I should state I pretty much eat that every morning so, get use it.  I might spice it up here and there, espically since I have to be careful the amount of eggs I eat until we figure out if its effecting Sir E or not, but for the most part thats pretty much breakfast.  For lunch I fed the Ladies leftover pizza.  I needed to get it out of my fridge.  Cold pizza is a weakness for sure.  I held strong though.  I had creamy beef and green bean caserole for lunch.  It was a leftover.  I added some leftover roasted veggies to go with it.  I didnt eat much though, I just wasnt feeling food.  I did however eat a banana and an apple for a snack a little later.  Dinner was a pretty good chicken chili.  I warmed up some beans and added it to the Ladies bowls.  Those Ladies love their beans and since they arent on a Whole30 with me this time, they are allowed the beans (and for today only the crappy leftover pizza).  For the most part Lady L will be doing it with me since she is home all week.  Lady G will be eating right fully during the weekends and then once a day since she has school.  I HATE that they do not allow us to bring in the kiddos lunches.  Ugh, their idea of "healthy" makes me gag.  Anyways, after dinner I made up a bowl of fruit with almond butter.  It beyond hit the spot.  One apple, pear, banana, and a few grapes mixed with almond butter so good.  I wish I had strawberries.  The store I shop at never seems to have good strawberries, though I might get some this week since I will probably have them eaten (between Lady L and I) in two or three days.

All in all I would say this was a good day one.  I need to up my fat intake, so I will need to pick up some cashews, avocados, and olives to add in for snacking during the first two weeks and of course to add with dinner. I was seriously craving sugar though and since Im coming off my period, I think that might be why, along with the stress of every day life.  Speaking of stress heres a little run down of my day:

We have a Good Choices Board.  At the top is excellent choices and if you stay there all day you get a quarter.  Both Ladies start on Good Choices.  Lady G (who usually jumps straight to excellent choices) drops down to a warning nearly first thing.  From there she drops to 5 minutes of time out.  Right after she gets out of time out I tell her and Lady L to clean up their room.  Lady L follows suit in grumbling with her sister, but stops once she enters her room.  Lady G however goes into full melt down (and Ive just put Sir E down for a nap).  So Lady G gets 5 minutes of time out, no kindle and a butt spank.  Lady L cleans up the room all by herself not a bit of complaining and sores up to excellent choices.  This kid is beaming.  Lady G some how loses tv before nap time.  After nap time things are going good then Lady G throws sand in her sisters face along with a few other bad choices and loses all toys.   She is now stuck sitting at the kitchen table.  I tell her if she can eat all her dinner with no complaints I will give her toys back, but if she misbehaves again she has to go to bed early.  Somehow Lady L  manages to drop all the way down to Try Again Tomorrow which has her starting off her day with zero toys and she has to work her way up.  Lady G finishes her dinner and is allowed to watch a movie since Lady L is now in bed, at 545...Yea...my day sucked.  Sir E is also developing this horrible cough that has me worried hes heading for an upper respiratory infection.  Im trying all I can to get this snot of his to dry up but even in the alternative medicine world, options are limited for a baby under a year.

Well I will be back tomorrow evening to write again.  Perhaps tomorrow I will be able to snap a few photos.